A place to begin (part 1)

I am intimately acquainted with shame. The reasons may be revealed in later posts. Or maybe you simply know the feeling. In which case reasons matter little. The shame that has directed and haunted many years of my life is tangible, immobilizing, and destructive. Shame is a vicious captor; a parasite. She wraps herself around her victims heart and assumes control. She is no respecter of persons. She works on victims and perpetrators alike. In her hands they become one in the same. Her dark inky lies seep in from various sources and stick like tar around the tender places of heart, soul, and spirit; blocking the truth, breeding more lies, hardening and settling.

Ok so maybe I am taking a dark and dramatic tone, but the bottom line is; I hate her (Shame). And in one beautiful moment, during a period of much brokenness that was beginning to mend, I came across a truth that has begun to free me from her grasp. Yes this truth is the good old fashion gospel laid out plain and simple in a very familiar verse, how could I have missed it? Well I did. Maybe some of you did too. So here it is:

"Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Hebrews 12:2

What I found here is that 1) I am not the only one that hates shame. Jesus despises shame he does not ever approve of her work. God's discipline and conviction look nothing like her. Their fruit is life and not soul crushing guilt that leads to more wrong doing. 2) In order to hate shame He must have experienced shame. Wait... how does the sinless Son of God feel shame? Because shame is not about what you have done. It is a black cloud of lies meant to darken your sky and convince you that God has forsaken you. Did Jesus Christ experience something like that? I believe he did, and it must have been just as real and deafening and terrifying as the way we sinners experience separation from God when we are trapped by shame and sin and shame... and 3) What joy was set before him? Well that's part 2.